|Assertiveness is a neutral mindset and behavior. You indicate your rightsand/or someone else’s in words, body language, and pro-active behavior.Assertiveness is a calm, upbeat form of communication; simple statement without apologies or excuses. Saying what you mean and meaning what you say is one aspect of assertiveness. |
Communication is clear, non-judgmental. Stating your needs and/or preferences informs your listeners of what you want them to know about you or the person for whom you are advocating. In brief, assertiveness is a socially helpful trait that prevents abuse, misunderstandings, and the passive acceptance of undesirable interactions. That leads to several other good things. Assertiveness is advocacy without verbal or physical violence. Assertive people come across as thoughtful, patient, wise, and honest. When people perceive you that way, you’re going to be respected and likely to have your needs met. If your needs can’t or won’t be met for reasons beyond your control, then assertiveness enables you to accept the reality with calm, not drama.
You ask clarifying questions such as “Who,” “How,” “What,” “Why,” “Where,” and “When” to better understand and appreciate the situation instead of making accusations. People like that reality-oriented behavior. They feel safe with you, not likely to suffer emotional turmoil. It’s a huge relief from the daily diss that too many people are willing to slam around, the onslaught of Facebook feuds, the insulting political statements that fill news reports and other forms of negativity. Respectful of other points of view, assertive people listen to what people say even if they disagree with them.
Assertiveness is about responding rather than reacting. Assertiveness means that you practice patient behavior even if you must stifle your impatient impulses. You think before you speak, edit your remarks to prevent coming across as rude, and choose the words that will help the other person to comprehend what you’re talking about. Read that sentence again; choosing your words is about being considerate of the other person’s point of view and experiences.
Self-respect rises and remains steady among assertive people. They are confident in their communication efforts, unfazed by the fear that they will be treated with disrespect. A great leadership skill, assertiveness helps everyone to have their needs met. Assertiveness minimizes the opportunities for things to go wrong. If they do, assertive behavior will make the best of the situation.
Honesty is a characteristic of assertive people. They don’t lie. At worst, they will withhold a negative comment to prevent anger and frustration among everyone involved. Assertive people wait for the right opportunity to explain a debatable point, an unpleasant reality, or the limitations of a situation. Listeners need to be receptive to things that they don’t want to hear, and assertive people cope with that fact.
In short, five wonderful benefits of being assertive include: neutrality/maturity advocacy rather than passivity or aggression The sharing of mutual respect /consideration. Self-respect, honesty. Deal with life in an assertive manner and your satisfaction with life overall will probably improve.
Yocheved Golani is a popular writer whose byline has appeared worldwide in print and online. A certified Health Information Management professional, she is a member of Get Help Israel. Certified in Spiritual Chaplaincy (End of Life issues) and in counseling skills, her life coaching for ill people puts healthy perspective into a clients’ success plan for achieving desired goals.